Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Me, the musician's wife

For those of you who know me, you are aware that I'm married to a part-time musician. It's not a life I expected to find myself in 10, 15 years ago. But it's a life I wouldn't trade for anything. As a musician's wife, I support my husband in different ways than most. I have to ask, how many women out there have a special rider on your insurance to cover guitars, amps, pedals and all the associated paraphernalia? How many wives find themselves carrying gear each weekend into bars, private homes, and other venues in support of your husband's hobby? My guess is not many.

I'm often asked what my thoughts are on Pete's hobby -- a very expensive hobby at that -- and I can only say that I love my husband. Because of my undying love, I support him fully. That's what marriage is about. In today's society, it's too easy to let the little annoyances in life become large issues that lead to the end of marriages. As a believer in Jesus Christ, divorce is not an option for me. We have our disagreements, as do all spouses, but there is no question in my mind that Pete's happiness and pleasure in playing guitar trumps everything.

I'd like to ask everyone who reads this to think about a few things. Do your actions and attitude support your spouse fully? Do you pray and seek God's guidance in how to make your marriage stronger each and every day? Do you seek to provide the calm, healthy haven in your home that your spouse deserves? I believe it's important to answer "yes" to each of those questions. If you can't, then I suggest you turn inward and look at your own intentions and expectations. Strong marriages mean putting aside your own needs for those of your spouse. That doesn't equate turning into a doormat for him or her to walk on, but it does mean giving up your selfish life. My prayer each day is to turn over myself for what God has planned for that day, and that includes putting my husband's needs before my own.

No comments: